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Taste Test From Hell: We Cooked a Bunch of Gross Recipes From the '50s

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  • #1

    Taste Test From Hell: We Cooked a Bunch of Gross Recipes From the '50s

    Taste Test From Hell: We Cooked a Bunch of Gross Recipes From the '50s



    Few things are more luridly delightful than midcentury food porn—fishy Jell-Os, mayonnaise frosting, all canned everything, foods ground up and then moulded into the shapes of other foods. If you've ever flipped through your grandma's post-war Betty Crocker cookbook, then you know what I'm grimacing about. These are recipes from leaner times, grounded in thriftiness and imperishability and resourcefulness. And, yes, Hot Dog Aspic Ambrosia is fun to gawk at in 2014, but what would happen...if you actually ate the food? Some friends and I decided to find out.
    Jezebel

    Articles like this drive me crazy. I've spent a lot of time studying food history and techniques. Partly this is just fascinating to me and partly I need it for stuff I do with with various reenactor groups. I can tell you all about why mid-century cooks liked Jello and why tuna makes so many appearances in recipes of that era. Let's just say that packet gelatin is a freaking miracle if you've ever made the real thing (I have) and the Food Police didn't get invented in the 1990s (kale is the New Tuna).

    Oh, that hilarious sandwich loaf? It's a pared down Smörgåstårta which is a wildly popular dish all around the Baltic under various names.

    "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Originally posted by Gingersnap View Post
    Jezebel

    Articles like this drive me crazy. I've spent a lot of time studying food history and techniques. Partly this is just fascinating to me and partly I need it for stuff I do with with various reenactor groups. I can tell you all about why mid-century cooks liked Jello and why tuna makes so many appearances in recipes of that era. Let's just say that packet gelatin is a freaking miracle if you've ever made the real thing (I have) and the Food Police didn't get invented in the 1990s (kale is the New Tuna).

    Oh, that hilarious sandwich loaf? It's a pared down Smörgåstårta which is a wildly popular dish all around the Baltic under various names.

    I almost died reading about Chicken-Cranberry Party Salad
    The year's at the spring
    And day's at the morn;
    Morning's at seven;
    The hill-side's dew-pearled;
    The lark's on the wing;
    The snail's on the thorn:
    God's in his heaven—
    All's right with the world!

    Comment

    • #3
      Ginger...you almost,almost sucked the fun out of this article.

      It was, hands down, the funniest food piece I've read...maybe ever.

      My sister's mother in law cooks like this. She serves some kind of jellied vegetable mold dish at holidays that tastes exactly like blendered macaroni salad. Nobody else eats it but her and me. It's a splencraptic throwback to the 50's and it fascinates me.
      Not where I breathe, but where I love, I live...
      Robert Southwell, S.J.

      Comment

      • #4
        Originally posted by Gingersnap View Post
        Oh, that hilarious sandwich loaf? It's a pared down Smörgåstårta which is a wildly popular dish all around the Baltic under various names.

        Hmmm....

        Shrimp, salmon, and what's that on the bottom? Herring?


        Not a big fish person, but absent the herring (if that's what it is), that actually looks pretty tasty, though I'd have to "jazz up" the shrimp a good bit.
        It's been ten years since that lonely day I left you
        In the morning rain, smoking gun in hand
        Ten lonely years but how my heart, it still remembers
        Pray for me, momma, I'm a gypsy now

        Comment

        • #5
          "Four is TOO MANY. This was basically a Vietnamese frisbee."

          LMAO!


          It's been ten years since that lonely day I left you
          In the morning rain, smoking gun in hand
          Ten lonely years but how my heart, it still remembers
          Pray for me, momma, I'm a gypsy now

          Comment

          • #6
            Originally posted by Adam View Post
            Hmmm....

            Shrimp, salmon, and what's that on the bottom? Herring?


            Not a big fish person, but absent the herring (if that's what it is), that actually looks pretty tasty, though I'd have to "jazz up" the shrimp a good bit.
            Smörgåstårta can be made of any savory components. Some are meat, some are veggie-only, most have cheese.

            Knock yourself out.
            "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."

            Comment

            • #7
              Originally posted by Adam View Post
              Hmmm....

              Shrimp, salmon, and what's that on the bottom? Herring?


              Not a big fish person, but absent the herring (if that's what it is), that actually looks pretty tasty, though I'd have to "jazz up" the shrimp a good bit.
              It's a club sandwich for fishetarians with mommies that love them enough to cut the crust off the bread.
              Not where I breathe, but where I love, I live...
              Robert Southwell, S.J.

              Comment

              • #8
                Originally posted by Gingersnap View Post
                Jezebel

                Articles like this drive me crazy. I've spent a lot of time studying food history and techniques. Partly this is just fascinating to me and partly I need it for stuff I do with with various reenactor groups. I can tell you all about why mid-century cooks liked Jello and why tuna makes so many appearances in recipes of that era. Let's just say that packet gelatin is a freaking miracle if you've ever made the real thing (I have) and the Food Police didn't get invented in the 1990s (kale is the New Tuna).

                Oh, that hilarious sandwich loaf? It's a pared down Smörgåstårta which is a wildly popular dish all around the Baltic under various names.

                I remember watching a Christopher Kimball special about recreating a Fannie Farmer dinner as it would've been cooked back then (late 1890's). It was so fun and interesting..and that was the first time that I realized what gelatin was made out of. Yes, packet gelatin is a freaking miracle.

                PS I like pineapple-upside-down cake a lot. But after I've had a couple of slices over a couple of days, I don't crave it for a long time.
                May we raise children who love the unloved things - the dandelion, the worm, the spiderlings.
                Children who sense the rose needs the thorn and run into rainswept days the same way they turn towards the sun...
                And when they're grown and someone has to speak for those who have no voice,
                may they draw upon that wilder bond, those days of tending tender things and be the one.

                Comment

                • #9
                  Originally posted by Michele View Post
                  I remember watching a Christopher Kimball special about recreating a Fannie Farmer dinner as it would've been cooked back then (late 1890's). It was so fun and interesting..and that was the first time that I realized what gelatin was made out of. Yes, packet gelatin is a freaking miracle.

                  PS I like pineapple-upside-down cake a lot. But after I've had a couple of slices over a couple of days, I don't crave it for a long time.
                  I think that pineapple-upside-down cake is sort of like fruitcake: when it's done really, really well (which generally means that it's practically swimming in booze), it is absolutely fantastic. When it's done poorly, it's dining drudgery.

                  The lady I work with makes a fruitcake (and fruitcake cookies) that are absolutely to die for. But it's absolutely bursting with the flavors of fresh ginger, fresh-ground cinnamon, a hearty taste of bourbon, fresh fruit, etc. It's a long, LONG way from what gets dropped off by UPS on your doorstep and dents your front door.

                  By the same token, I've had wonderfully, delightfully light, fluffy pineapple-upside-down cake before that was delicious: tasty with a hint of citrus (usually lemon) while still having a "body" that was dense and tasty. I've also had pineapple-upside-down cake that had the consistency of a cinder block.

                  YMMV, I suppose.
                  It's been ten years since that lonely day I left you
                  In the morning rain, smoking gun in hand
                  Ten lonely years but how my heart, it still remembers
                  Pray for me, momma, I'm a gypsy now

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Adam View Post
                    I think that pineapple-upside-down cake is sort of like fruitcake: when it's done really, really well (which generally means that it's practically swimming in booze), it is absolutely fantastic. When it's done poorly, it's dining drudgery.

                    The lady I work with makes a fruitcake (and fruitcake cookies) that are absolutely to die for. But it's absolutely bursting with the flavors of fresh ginger, fresh-ground cinnamon, a hearty taste of bourbon, fresh fruit, etc. It's a long, LONG way from what gets dropped off by UPS on your doorstep and dents your front door.

                    By the same token, I've had wonderfully, delightfully light, fluffy pineapple-upside-down cake before that was delicious: tasty with a hint of citrus (usually lemon) while still having a "body" that was dense and tasty. I've also had pineapple-upside-down cake that had the consistency of a cinder block.

                    YMMV, I suppose.
                    I know exactly what you mean, Adam. I am not a fruitcake hater. That's what I make for my extended family every Christmas and the 14 of them would cry if I stopped making them. Freshly dried fruits ie candied orange rind and ginger, apricots, pineapple, blueberries, cranberries, cherries..lots of of pecans and lastly, rum. We love it..I still hoard a couple of them in our freezer.
                    May we raise children who love the unloved things - the dandelion, the worm, the spiderlings.
                    Children who sense the rose needs the thorn and run into rainswept days the same way they turn towards the sun...
                    And when they're grown and someone has to speak for those who have no voice,
                    may they draw upon that wilder bond, those days of tending tender things and be the one.

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Michele View Post
                      I remember watching a Christopher Kimball special about recreating a Fannie Farmer dinner as it would've been cooked back then (late 1890's). It was so fun and interesting..and that was the first time that I realized what gelatin was made out of. Yes, packet gelatin is a freaking miracle.

                      PS I like pineapple-upside-down cake a lot. But after I've had a couple of slices over a couple of days, I don't crave it for a long time.
                      Frannie's Last Supper! I have the book and I did the jellies!
                      "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Gingersnap View Post
                        Frannie's Last Supper! I have the book and I did the jellies!
                        I have the cookbook also but I really treat it like a storybook..I should pull it out. My girlfriend went to his book signing in Portland, OR and gave it to me for Christmas. CK and all his minions are my absolute favorites when it comes to cooking, recipes and the way foods work with each other.

                        I can see where you would be naturally attracted to the science behind food preparation, Ginger. I'm very impressed that you made those jellies.
                        May we raise children who love the unloved things - the dandelion, the worm, the spiderlings.
                        Children who sense the rose needs the thorn and run into rainswept days the same way they turn towards the sun...
                        And when they're grown and someone has to speak for those who have no voice,
                        may they draw upon that wilder bond, those days of tending tender things and be the one.

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Michele View Post
                          I have the cookbook also but I really treat it like a storybook..I should pull it out. My girlfriend went to his book signing in Portland, OR and gave it to me for Christmas. CK and all his minions are my absolute favorites when it comes to cooking, recipes and the way foods work with each other.

                          I can see where you would be naturally attracted to the science behind food preparation, Ginger. I'm very impressed that you made those jellies.
                          If I ever meet Ginger in real life I'm going to make her eat a Twinkie. Just once.
                          Not where I breathe, but where I love, I live...
                          Robert Southwell, S.J.

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Originally posted by phillygirl View Post
                            If I ever meet Ginger in real life I'm going to make her eat a Twinkie. Just once.
                            Better than you have tried, my friend.
                            "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Originally posted by phillygirl View Post
                              Ginger...you almost,almost sucked the fun out of this article.

                              It was, hands down, the funniest food piece I've read...maybe ever.
                              Have you ever seen the Gallery of Regrettable Food?
                              Enjoy.

                              Comment

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