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How Did It Get to Be 'OK' for People to Be Late for Everything?

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  • How Did It Get to Be 'OK' for People to Be Late for Everything?

    This post may offend some readers, recruiters or not. But only because it's going to cut close to the bone for many.

    And I don't care if I sound old-fashioned, because actually it's nothing to do with 'fashion' or 'generation'. It's got everything to do with basic good manners and respect for other people.

    So here goes... How did it get to be "OK" for people to be late for everything?

    Because as far as I am concerned, it's not OK.

    In recent years it seems that a meeting set to start at 9 am, for some people means in the general vicinity of any time which starts with the numeral '9'. Like 9.30 for example.

    People drift in at 9.10 or 9.20, or even later. And they smile warmly at the waiting group, as they unwrap their bacon sandwich, apparently totally unconcerned that others have been there since five to nine, prepared and ready to start.

    10 people kept waiting in a meeting for 20 minutes, while some selfish pratt who idles his way via the coffee shop, is actually 20 minutes times 10, which is 200 minutes wasted - while you keep us waiting because you did not catch the earlier bus. That is over 3 hours wasted. By you! How much has that cost the business? Shall I send you an invoice?

    And an arrangement to meet someone for a business meeting at a coffee shop at 3 pm, more often than not means at 3.10 you get a text saying 'I am five minutes away' which inevitably means 10 minutes, and so you wait for 15 or 20 minutes, kicking your heels in frustration.

    And often these 'latecomers' are people who have requested the meeting in the first place, are asking for your help, or are selling something. Fat chance mate!

    And of course this has massive application to the recruitment industry, where lateness is both commonplace and hugely damaging to your personal and corporate brand.

    And it's not only business.


    More at Link
    May we raise children who love the unloved things - the dandelion, the worm, the spiderlings.
    Children who sense the rose needs the thorn and run into rainswept days the same way they turn towards the sun...
    And when they're grown and someone has to speak for those who have no voice,
    may they draw upon that wilder bond, those days of tending tender things and be the one.

  • #2
    Raise a bunch of self-centered kids to believe that they're more important than anybody else, and this is what you get.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Bob Loblaw 3.0 View Post
      Raise a bunch of self-centered kids to believe that they're more important than anybody else, and this is what you get.
      Objectivists?
      "There are four lights!"

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Billy Jingo View Post
        Objectivists?
        I don't think this is limited to one end of the political spectrum, if that's what you're getting at.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Michele View Post
          This post may offend some readers, recruiters or not. But only because it's going to cut close to the bone for many.

          And I don't care if I sound old-fashioned, because actually it's nothing to do with 'fashion' or 'generation'. It's got everything to do with basic good manners and respect for other people.

          So here goes... How did it get to be "OK" for people to be late for everything?

          Because as far as I am concerned, it's not OK.

          In recent years it seems that a meeting set to start at 9 am, for some people means in the general vicinity of any time which starts with the numeral '9'. Like 9.30 for example.

          People drift in at 9.10 or 9.20, or even later. And they smile warmly at the waiting group, as they unwrap their bacon sandwich, apparently totally unconcerned that others have been there since five to nine, prepared and ready to start.

          10 people kept waiting in a meeting for 20 minutes, while some selfish pratt who idles his way via the coffee shop, is actually 20 minutes times 10, which is 200 minutes wasted - while you keep us waiting because you did not catch the earlier bus. That is over 3 hours wasted. By you! How much has that cost the business? Shall I send you an invoice?

          And an arrangement to meet someone for a business meeting at a coffee shop at 3 pm, more often than not means at 3.10 you get a text saying 'I am five minutes away' which inevitably means 10 minutes, and so you wait for 15 or 20 minutes, kicking your heels in frustration.

          And often these 'latecomers' are people who have requested the meeting in the first place, are asking for your help, or are selling something. Fat chance mate!

          And of course this has massive application to the recruitment industry, where lateness is both commonplace and hugely damaging to your personal and corporate brand.

          And it's not only business.


          More at Link
          I clearly tell anyone selling something that I've set aside a time to meet with them an make a decision. When the time is up, that's it and I'm out. It got interesting with an insurance policy, the guy was 20 minutes late and the application took 15 minutes to fill out. That left him with only 25 minutes to go through 130 pages of material he was required by law to present to me.

          At 11:45, I stated that I didn't have enough information to apply so we needed to reschedule to finish up. He got irate (very stupid thing to do in sales) that I "wasted his time" and that I should reschedule my next appointment (who had just texted to say that he was already downstairs) to give him the chance to make the sale and hit his quota for the month. I bought the policy later, but not from him.
          "Faith is nothing but a firm assent of the mind : which, if it be regulated, as is our duty, cannot be afforded to anything but upon good reason, and so cannot be opposite to it."

          -John Locke

          Comment


          • #6
            I find the sales people, more and more, are doing the late thing, with no notice. I am always on time (5 minutes early) for professional purposes; always late for personal purposes. I figure that says something about my priorities. It's a problem.
            Not where I breathe, but where I love, I live...
            Robert Southwell, S.J.

            Comment


            • #7
              Sorry to be late to this thread.

              I have to admit I've often thought that one or two minutes wasn't a big deal. Half an hour late is overkill. When they have a meeting scheduled at work, I'm often trying to figure out whether to stop taking calls early or to be late to this meeting. I usually stop taking calls early. Nobody has gotten onto me yet for it. In fact, our supervisor once told us to go. If I show up late for mass, and it's a particular priest, he'll call me and the others who were late out. It's always better to come to places early than to risk being late.

              Comment


              • #8
                This was always a huge issue with my Father. You were never to be late for anything. Joyce's family has the 15 minute rule. The actual expected time of arrival is 15 minutes after the set time. When we lived back East we always told them a time that was 15 minutes before we wanted them there. We admitted this once and her one sister started showing up 30 minutes after the timeline because she knew we told her 15 minutes early so she factored that in.

                I could never understand this game.

                Patients show up late to their appointments at our clinic fairly regularly. If it's late in the day and they are 10 minutes late I have the front desk reschedule them. I swear it is always a medicaid patient who isn't working.
                If it pays, it stays

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Frostbit View Post
                  This was always a huge issue with my Father. You were never to be late for anything. Joyce's family has the 15 minute rule. The actual expected time of arrival is 15 minutes after the set time. When we lived back East we always told them a time that was 15 minutes before we wanted them there. We admitted this once and her one sister started showing up 30 minutes after the timeline because she knew we told her 15 minutes early so she factored that in.

                  I could never understand this game.

                  Patients show up late to their appointments at our clinic fairly regularly. If it's late in the day and they are 10 minutes late I have the front desk reschedule them. I swear it is always a medicaid patient who isn't working.
                  I wish our doctors did this. I hate that we have to wait an hour because someone else was late. This isn't the ER.

                  Although just to get even I had a few beers with a doc. When it was my turn I showed up with the round 30 minutes later. When he complained I just said that the bar was backed up and if it was an emergency he should have just dialled 911.
                  "Faith is nothing but a firm assent of the mind : which, if it be regulated, as is our duty, cannot be afforded to anything but upon good reason, and so cannot be opposite to it."

                  -John Locke

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by scott View Post
                    I wish our doctors did this. I hate that we have to wait an hour because someone else was late. This isn't the ER.

                    Although just to get even I had a few beers with a doc. When it was my turn I showed up with the round 30 minutes later. When he complained I just said that the bar was backed up and if it was an emergency he should have just dialled 911.
                    My nurse and I both have OCD. If you ever waited longer than 10 minutes for me it would represent the day from hell.
                    If it pays, it stays

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      People with small children get some slack. Anyone else, if you're chronically late, you're making a statement that my time or my company isn't important to you. We won't be making plans very often in that case.
                      "Think as I think," said a man,
                      "Or you are abominably wicked;
                      You are a toad."
                      And after I had thought of it,
                      I said: "I will, then, be a toad." - Stephen Crane

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I hate this behavior. At work if I say we are doing X at 9:00 a.m., X will commence at that time - we aren't waiting for you and we aren't bringing you up to speed a half an hour later. People unpleasantly learn that latecomers get assignments they don't like because they aren't there to reason their way out of it.

                        I used to politely wait around for late people socially. The cell phone has just destroyed timeliness. Now I give them 10 minutes and then I do whatever it is we were going to do: order lunch, go to the gallery, start riding down the path, etc. If they catch up, great! If they don't, oh well....

                        It usually only takes one event to sharpen people up. I'd rather that people with a real emergency just cancel the date and then reschedule it. I usually have other plans lined up for after and any serious lateness will screw up the rest of my day.
                        "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Celeste Chalfonte View Post
                          People with small children get some slack. Anyone else, if you're chronically late, you're making a statement that my time or my company isn't important to you. We won't be making plans very often in that case.
                          I imagined your voice when I read this article, Celeste.

                          Originally posted by Gingersnap View Post
                          I hate this behavior. At work if I say we are doing X at 9:00 a.m., X will commence at that time - we aren't waiting for you and we aren't bringing you up to speed a half an hour later. People unpleasantly learn that latecomers get assignments they don't like because they aren't there to reason their way out of it.

                          I used to politely wait around for late people socially. The cell phone has just destroyed timeliness. Now I give them 10 minutes and then I do whatever it is we were going to do: order lunch, go to the gallery, start riding down the path, etc. If they catch up, great! If they don't, oh well....

                          It usually only takes one event to sharpen people up. I'd rather that people with a real emergency just cancel the date and then reschedule it. I usually have other plans lined up for after and any serious lateness will screw up the rest of my day.
                          I think that's true in most cases..usually people don't like to be singled out for their bad behavior.

                          The only thing I would do opposite is not show up for dinner early. I had two older couples who would come anywhere from 30 to 45 mins early and I'm sorry, I need that time if for nothing else to just relax after all the planning and preparations are finished.
                          May we raise children who love the unloved things - the dandelion, the worm, the spiderlings.
                          Children who sense the rose needs the thorn and run into rainswept days the same way they turn towards the sun...
                          And when they're grown and someone has to speak for those who have no voice,
                          may they draw upon that wilder bond, those days of tending tender things and be the one.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Frostbit View Post

                            Patients show up late to their appointments at our clinic fairly regularly. If it's late in the day and they are 10 minutes late I have the front desk reschedule them. I swear it is always a medicaid patient who isn't working.
                            That's funny, I was going to offer that we learn lateness from doctors. Save the excuses, we all know what they are and they keep coming back to poor time management (ie schedule jamming). I have actually had a doctor whose secretary tells you upfront before your first appointment, "Dr. McClaren understands that you value your time as much as she does. She sees her patients on time. If you are late to your appointment, you will have to be rescheduled so that it doesn't inconvenience the patient who comes after you." To her credit, that woman was always on time... and so was I.

                            But she is the only doctor I have ever had that was like that. My current doctor is acceptable on time. If your appointment is at 10 you will be out of there by 10:30. I have also waited literally hours to see doctors at Tampa General's vascular center. Their excuse is always that one of the doctors had to go to surgery or something, leaving another doctor with a doubled schedule. They couldn't have called me and told me there was a problem before I drive 45 minutes, paid to park, and climbed the tower?
                            The year's at the spring
                            And day's at the morn;
                            Morning's at seven;
                            The hill-side's dew-pearled;
                            The lark's on the wing;
                            The snail's on the thorn:
                            God's in his heaven—
                            All's right with the world!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Michele View Post
                              I imagined your voice when I read this article, Celeste.

                              I think that's true in most cases..usually people don't like to be singled out for their bad behavior.

                              The only thing I would do opposite is not show up for dinner early. I had two older couples who would come anywhere from 30 to 45 mins early and I'm sorry, I need that time if for nothing else to just relax after all the planning and preparations are finished.
                              My first party in Florida was a surprise. I didn't put hours on the invitation and people started showing up at 7:45 pm, a good hour before I expected anyone. I had just gotten out of the shower.
                              The year's at the spring
                              And day's at the morn;
                              Morning's at seven;
                              The hill-side's dew-pearled;
                              The lark's on the wing;
                              The snail's on the thorn:
                              God's in his heaven—
                              All's right with the world!

                              Comment

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